One one hand, I feel like I would give anything to go back to where we were and who we were. Not a care in the world, everything seemed so simple; life was on our side.
On the other hand, we have grown so much closer because of all we've been through. And even though more times than not it feels like we have a "push/pull" relationship with God, we have also grown closer to Him and stronger in our faith and what we believe.
We have definitely learned (and are still learning) what is truly important. Our families and friends have rallied around us and shown support, and for this we are truly grateful. Our lives look like nothing we would have planned. Brad absolutely misses his hobbies (his truck, motorcycle, and playing golf) and all of the everyday stuff (yard and house work, holding hands while walking through a store, opening doors for us, etc.).
It's weird but it's like the injury has erased a lot of what we used to do as well. I can only remember a few things of our routine before. It's a blessing and a curse at the same time, but there are times when it makes me so sad because memories are all we have from our life before.
I've said it before but it becomes all-consuming (suffocating, depressing, no way around) when I actually stop and consider the magnitude of what we've been through (pain and infertility as a result) and continue to battle daily.
"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." -Galatians 6:9
I repeat to myself over and over... Our good and Your glory, God. Our good and Your glory...
This was from my devotion this morning, Jesus Today. |
Brad took this at our lake last weekend! Amazing! |
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